I’m lying on a yoga mat in between two other new mums, humming and ohming gently in unison. A gentle gong signals the end of our guided meditation session, and we slowly bat open our eyelids and wiggle our fingers and toes. Our babies are being looked after by trained midwives and Norland Nannies in the 24/7 nursery next door, so after the class we’re invited to stay and mingle with the other parents. After all, it takes a village, and who else will understand the simple pleasure of momentarily escaping your small sleep-thief than a similarly sleep-deprived new mum?
But I’m not quite relaxed enough to do that yet. As I stretch and leap up, my mind is already on the logistics of the day – the next nap, the next meal, if I’ll be able to make the next session, and worrying about keeping my 5-year-old (who has joined us with my partner) busy.
Having my first son, Marley, during Covid was an unusual and at times lonely experience. Hospital appointments were solo, postpartum health visitor appointments were remote and mum classes were either banned or scarce. And while the shock of adjusting to life as a parent would not be as great the second time, I knew that resources geared toward the needs of mums would still be limited and baby-centric.
It has always surprised me how often mothers are treated like a discarded Kinder Surprise once their baby is born. And so it was with great triumph that I stumbled across the 40-day confinement movement. Trending reels show new mums being taken care of by specialised postpartum nannies across India, Korea and China, where it is the custom to stay in bed for the ‘fourth trimester’.
New mums are fed special nutrient-rich meals and broths in bed to replenish the vitamins lost during childbirth, rebalance their hormones and boost breast milk. They are encouraged to rest and receive healing massages and aftercare while their baby is cared for. Some even visit luxury postpartum retreats for recovery and pampering.
Gradually, those retreats have begun to move westward. Now, you can pay to extend your stay after birth at some hospitals, while sanctuaries like the Little Comfort Farm in Devon offer a postpartum retreat which focuses on keeping the whole family, including older siblings, happy.
So when my second son, Raife, came along, I was thrilled to be given the chance to experience Tenth Wellness at The Mandarin Oriental in Knightsbridge. The retreat offers new mums tailored packages straight from the hospital and up to a year after birth. Although I had initially planned to visit three weeks after birth, when my partner returned to work – a period that was difficult for me the first time around – logistics mean I don’t end up visiting until we’re knee-deep in the four-month sleep regression.
